After India's Test debacle, BCCI had a feeling that 'somethings gotta give' which resulted in Ravi Shastri's appointment © AFP
After India’s Test debacle, BCCI had a feeling that ‘somethings gotta give’ which resulted in Ravi Shastri’s appointment © AFP

Please note this is a humour article — work of pure fiction

The Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) took the call to bring in Ravi Shastri to oversee the affairs of the Indian ODI team for the England series. Abhijit Banare looks at 13 reasons for Shastri’s appointment, the reason behind it in the form of clichés.

Indian cricket is in doldrums after another humiliating loss in an overseas Test series. Under pressure cooker situation to bring a change, the board finally found Ravishankar Jayadritha Shastri to rescue the team. Well, BCCI is yet to confirm whether they were fed up of Shastri as commentator or it really wanted Indian cricket to improve, but here’s what we through about Ravi Shastri’s appointment and it’s analysis in clichés.

Q1. Why did BCCI want Ravi Shastri as the Team Director?

A: (Obvious) That’s what the doctor ordered.

Q2. (Jokes aside) What was the real reason why BCCI bring in Ravi Shastri to the Indian team set-up?

A: With so many losses, BCCI just got a feeling that something’s gotta give.

Q3. How did Ravi Shastri react when he was appointed Team Director?

A: He threw the kitchen sink away.

Q4. What did the BCCI want to achieve by appointing Shastri as Team Director?

A: Because in the end they wanted cricket to be the winner.

Q5. How did Ravi Shastri know that he was going to appointed as the Team Director?

A: Because he saw that coming.

Q6. What advice from coach Duncan Fletcher and MS Dhoni forced BCCI to act so quickly?

A: Because they said, India were losing the plot thick and fast.

Q7. Why did BCCI decide to appoint Ravi Shastri as director for the full ODI series?

A: Because they never believed in half-measures.

Q8. Why should the Indian team be happy about Ravi Sashtri as Team Director?

A: They couldn’t have asked for anything better

Q9. Why did it take so long for the BCCI to appoint Ravi Shastri as incharge of Indian team?

A: Because whenever they tried, someone pulled the odd one back.

Q10. What ability of Ravi Shastri will benefit the Indian team?

A: Indian cricket is always in pressure cooker situation. No one better than Shastri to handle them.

Q11. Why will the Indian team be more aggressive under Ravi Shastri?

A: Because now the team will deal in boundaries.

Q12. Why will Ravi Shastri be the best man to manage the batsmen, bowlers and fielders simultaneously?

A: Because he always loves mixing it up nicely.

Q13.Why did Ravi Shastri accept the job?

A: Because he wanted to have a crack at it.

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Complete coverage of India’s tour of England 2014

(Abhijit Banare is a reporter at CricketCountry. He is an avid quizzer and loves to analyse and dig out interesting facts which allows him to learn something new every day. Apart from cricket he also likes to keep a sharp eye on Indian politics, and can be followed on Twitter and blog)