Home > Features > Humour >

Bhuvneshwar Kumar to be under GPS surveillance; BCCI come up with novel idea to protect fast bowlers!

Bhuvneshwar Kumar to be under GPS surveillance; BCCI come up with novel idea to protect fast bowlers!

The GPS will not only keep check where Bhuvneshwar Kumar (right) is but also ensure he stays away from so-called experts who are asking bowlers to reduce their pace and focus only on line and length © PTI

Please note: This is a humorous piece – pure fiction.

By Amrut Thobbi

Bhuvneshwar Kumar, who impressed one and all with his guile, swing and accuracy in the first T20 match against Pakistan, is to be placed under special scanner by the Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI). With the idea of preserving the fast bowler and preventing him from getting lost like so many Indian fast bowlers in the past, the BCCI has decided to keep a sharp eye on his whereabouts 24×7 with the help of Global Positioning System (GPS) technology.

Explaining the decision, BCCI chief N Srinivasan told the media that the decision was taken after watching the bowler blow away Pakistan’s top order with his impressive swing bowling. “When we saw Bhuvneshwar bowl like that and take all those wickets, we knew we have found a good talent. This time we are determined to preserve him for a long time,” said Srinivasan.

Citing a long list of fast bowlers who have worn the Indian jersey in the recent past, Srinivasan emphasised that the GPS is not just about keeping an “eye on the bowler” but also to ensure he doesn’t take advice from the wrong people.

“Many of our fast bowlers in the past like Raju Kulkarni, Subroto Bannerjee, Paras Mhambrey, Debashish Mohanty, Bharathi Arun, Aavishkar Salvi, Bhupinder Singh, Tinu Yohanan, VRV Singh, Manpreet Gony, Pankaj Singh etc. came with much promise and then disappeared. The GPS will not only keep check where they are but also ensure they stay away from so-called experts who are asking them to reduce their pace and focus only on line and length,” said the BCCI president.

Srinivasan did not lose the opportunity to hammer the point that the introduction of GPS to track the fast bowlers is clear evidence that India is not opposed to technology, as “we are often accused of by our critics”.

In a surprising move, the BCCI has appointed ACP Pradyuman and his famous CID team to keep track of the Indian bowlers with the help of GPS. “The CID will primarily help BCCI monitor the location of the fast bowlers in the BCCI list. Inspector Daya and Inspector Abhijeet will rush to the ‘crime spot’ and nab the ‘culprit’ masquerading as experts and advising Indian bowlers that could lead to their extinction.

The BCCI has already tested out the efficacy of the GPS experiment on Shantakumaran Sreesanth and Munaf Patel on whose legs the equipment was strapped. In Sreesanth’s case, the GPS traced unsteady movements somewhere in Kerala. It was later revealed that the crazy movements were thanks to Sreesanth doing some crazy steps like he did against Andre Nel. The second case proved to be a tough riddle for the CID as there were absolutely no movements traced back from Munaf’s device. The fast bowler later informed the BCCI that he was at his home the whole day – doing nothing!

(Amrut Thobbi, an engineering graduate and a Masters in Communication & Journalism, is an ardent cricket fan who likes to write spoofs. His passion for writing inspired him to give up a sales and marketing job, which he does not regret. He has also worked as a freelance writer in education and technology sectors. He can be followed on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/amrut.thobbi and on Twitter athttps://twitter.com/amrutti)

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 20, 2014 (14:30 IST)   at Kolkata

South Africa tour of New Zealand, 2014

Oct 21, 2014 (03:00 IST)   at Mount Maunganui

Pakistan vs Australia in UAE, 2014

Oct 22, 2014 (11:30 IST)   at Dubai

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 22, 2014 (19:00 IST)   at Cuttack

South Africa tour of New Zealand, 2014

Oct 24, 2014 (03:00 IST)   at Mount Maunganui

More

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 17, 2014  at Dharamsala

India won by 59 runs

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 14, 2014  at Visakhapatnam

Match cancelled

Pakistan vs Australia in UAE, 2014

Oct 12, 2014  at Abu Dhabi

Australia won by 1 run

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 11, 2014  at Delhi

India won by 48 runs

Pakistan vs Australia in UAE, 2014

Oct 10, 2014  at Dubai

Australia won by 5 wkts

Photos

India vs West Indies 4th ODI at Dharamsala

Videos

AB de Villiers speaks ahead of New Zealand ODIs

South Africa vs New Zealand 2014: 5 memorable matches

Yasir Shah: The new spinning sensation for Pakistan

Virat Kohli takes wicket with the first (0th?) ball of his T20I career

Kevin Pietersen’s autobiography — a litany of complaints with a few redeeming patches

Banning West Indian players in IPL can affect the ‘Brand value’ of the event – Will BCCI take this gamble?

Australia Australia tour of UAE 2014 BCCI India India vs West Indies India vs West Indies 2014 New Zealand Pakistan Salaam Cricket South Africa West Indies West Indies cancel India tour 2014 West Indies tour of India 2014 West Indies vs India West Indies vs India 2014

Pat Cummins set to return for Australia during T20Is against South Africa

Shane Watson desperate to make comeback

New Zealand restricted to 230 in 1st ODI against South Africa

IPL success embodies emergence of sports as global industry, says India’s representative at UN

Live Cricket Score: New Zealand vs South Africa, 1st ODI at Mount Maunganui

Virat Kohli becomes fastest to 20 ODI hundreds

A Pakistan all-time XI: A galaxy of captains

James Neesham can provide more impetus to New Zealand’s weakened batting up the order

Virender Sehwag turns 36: Five most memorable innings of the Nawab of Najafgarh

New Zealand begin ICC World Cup 2015 preparations with 15 ODIs in store

Fan of the Day

Gautam Singh

Gautam Singh

474 Posts | 5 Fans

Video Highlights Mohammed Yousuf drops catch after watching a girl in bikini

अभिनेत्री हुमा कुरैशी ओरिफ्लेम की ब्रांड एंबेसडर

Has Bigg Boss 8 made Karishma Tanna the most hated person?

Pranab Mukherjee returns home after visit to Norway, Finland

Revealed: First look of Amitabh Bachchan-Farhan Akhtar’s Do!

7 reasons why having sex during pregnancy is great for your health

Videocon Infinium Graphite with gesture control feature launched, priced at Rs 10,499

Rupee up 19 paise against dollar in early trade

Twitter introduces Audio Cards to listen to music directly from your timeline

Also on cricketcountry.com

Play Fantasy Cricket & Win

Cash Daily! Click here