Home > Features > Humour >

Shahid Afridi’s birth certificate discovered in an archaeological dig at Mohenjo-Daro

Shahid Afridi s birth certificate discovered in an archaeological dig at Mohenjo-Daro

Shahid Afiridi s first reaction on being told that his birth certificate has finally been discovered and has gone public! © Getty Images

 

Please note: This is a humorous piece – pure fiction.

 

Mankind is a step closer to determining the precise age of Pakistan cricketer Shahid Afridi after archaeologists stumbled upon his birth certificate during an ongoing excavation at Mohenjo-Daro, an archeological site situated in the province of Sindh, Pakistan and designated a UNESCO World Heritage Site in 1980. The document confirms what cricket pundits have suspected for a long time: that the mercurial Pathan is at least 4000 years old.

 

Afridi himself bashfully acknowledged his ancient vintage, nostalgically recalling his idyllic days as kid frolicking about in the bylanes of Mohenjo-Daro, then easily the leading city of the subcontinent. ”Civic amenities were much better then – well planned streets, public baths, efficient sewage and garbage disposal,” wistfully noted Afridi.

 

Of course, the Brits hadn’t civilised yet and were clubbing each other to death then and young Afridi would have to wait a bit for his cricketing debut. He did model for the odd assignment, including for the bust of Mohenjo-Daro, before the city was razed to the ground by marauding, horse-mounted Aryan warriors, stooping down from what was even then considered the wild, lawless, North-West frontier. “That was a chaotic phase. Break-down of law and order, erosion of civilized values, rampant extremism …conditions quite similar to what many parts of Pakistan are grappling with now,” he noted with sadness.

 

The invasions induced young Afridi to migrate to the ‘Wild West’ and set up base around the Khyber Pass to take up a career as a frontiersman. A relatively uneventful life of obscurity followed, before the flamboyant cricketer shot to fame with his sensational cricketing debut at the ripe old age of 16 against Sri Lanka in 1996.

 

Historians contend that the dashing all-rounder now holds the key to their unlocking the mysteries of that hoary, pre-Vedic past, including the hitherto undeciphered Indus Valley script. This of course means that they are not anywhere closer to doing so.

 

(Reproduced with permission from http://www.theunrealtimes.com/. The UnReal Times is one of the top websites for satire, spoof, parody and humour in India)

India tour of Australia 2014, Practice matches

Nov 24, 2014 (05:29 IST)   at Glenelg, Adelaide

Pakistan vs New Zealand in UAE, 2014

Nov 26, 2014 (11:30 IST)   at Sharjah

India tour of Australia 2014, Practice matches

Nov 28, 2014 (05:29 IST)   at Adelaide

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Nov 28, 2014 (12:00 IST)   at Dhaka

Afghanistan tour of UAE, 2014

Nov 28, 2014 (15:30 IST)   at Dubai

More

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Nov 26, 2014  at Dhaka

Bangladesh won by 124 runs

England tour of Sri Lanka, 2014

Nov 26, 2014  at Colombo

Sri Lanka won by 25 runs

Hong Kong tour of Sri Lanka, 2014

Nov 24, 2014  at Colombo

Hong Kong won by 2 wkts

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Nov 23, 2014  at Chittagong

Bangladesh won by 68 runs

South Africa tour of Australia, 2014

Nov 23, 2014  at Sydney

Australia won by 2 wickets (D/L method)

Photos

Phil Hughes suffers head injury: In photos

Videos

Phil Hughes passes away: Video tribute

Phillip Hughes passes away: Let us bring Sean Abbott back on track

Phil Hughes and other cricketers who succumbed to on-field injuries

Phillip Hughes 7th-youngest Test cricketer to die

Phillip Hughes: A brief look at the career of one of Australia’s most promising talents

Phillip Hughes: Rest in peace

Australia England India India tour of Australia 2014-15 New Zealand New Zealand tour of UAE 2014 New Zealand vs Pakistan New Zealand vs Pakistan 2014 Pakistan Pakistan vs New Zealand Pakistan vs New Zealand 2014 Phil Hughes Phil Hughes Death Phil Hughes head injury Phillip Hughes

Sri Lanka v England, 2nd ODI at Colombo, Preview: Hosts look to continue domination over England

Phil Hughes passes away: Former England cricketers feels for Sean Abbott

Phil Hughes passes away: Sourav Ganguly expresses grief

Bengal announce 14-member squad for Col CK Nayudu tournament

Phillip Hughes passes away: Sri Lanka Cricket expresses grief

Phil Hughes: Remembering his most memorable knocks

Phillip Hughes passes away: Kolkata is where Kolkata was

Phillip Hughes passes away: Crying for Phillip Hughes

Phillip Hughes passes away: Let us bring Sean Abbott back on track

Phil Hughes and other cricketers who succumbed to on-field injuries

Fan of the Day

Niharika Shah

Niharika Shah

682 Posts | 6 Fans

Video: Phil Hughes suffers head injury, collapses on field during New South Wales vs South Australia tie

More broadband connections to boost GDP growth in Asia Pacific: GSMA

Yo Yo Honey Singh goes into depression? His whereabouts unknown!

इबोला प्रायोगिक दवा के प्रयोग के नतीजे सकारात्मक आए

Shocking: Priyanka Chopra’s property a part of a sex racket?

Salman Khan, Shah Rukh Khan, and Aamir Khan to share stage with Rajat Sharma to celebrate 21 years of Aap Ki Adaalat!

India is becoming our largest overseas market, Xiaomi CEO Lei Jun says

Kanika Maheshwari aka Meenakshi of Diya Aur Baati Hum: Gautam needs to control his anger a little

सुपरमॉडल केट का क्रिसमस के लिए ब्यूटी टिप्स

Also on cricketcountry.com

Play Fantasy Cricket & Win

Cash Daily! Click here