Please note this is a humour article — work of pure fiction
This is absolutely atrocious. Ridiculous. The West Indies Cricket Board (WICB) ended a riveting series early. The Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) are quite right in their unequivocal rage. The nerve of WICB, ending a series so soon after Virat Kohli got to form!
In fact, the real reason BCCI is so upset is that after a nightmarish few months, Kohli was just regaining his lost form. He had already scored a fifty in the second match, and then got his 20th One-Day International (ODI) hundred in what proved to be the final game of the tour. With one ODI still to play, Kohli would probably have added one more to his tally of tons.
And that’s not all; Kohli is currently the best T20I batsman in the world according to the rankings, which means he misses out on an opportunity to consolidate his position. And after that he had the perfect opportunity to increase his run tally in Test matches as well.
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BCCI secretary Sanjay Patel had issued a media release saying that BCCI was “shocked and surprised” at the cancellation of the tour. The official continued his indignant tirade when he said, “Now he’ll have to wait for 10-15 days to score another hundred. How is this fair on him? It is a good thing that the Sri Lankan board was so obliging. Otherwise Virat’s good form would have been wasted.”
In fact our sources reveal that the real reason for Sri Lanka stepping on was to allow Virat to continue his century-making habits. Patel had revealed on Saturday that the England and Wales Cricket Board (ECB) was willing to send a team. The BCCI was almost about to confirm because that would allow Indians to continue taking the revenge of the Test series defeat.
However, the board just couldn’t reply to ECB’s mail because that would mean Kohlis poor form would return. But then things fell in place perfectly when the Sri Lanka Cricket jumped on to the proposal of a bilateral series with India.
The board was delighted because they learnt that 25 per cent of Kohli’s century have come against Lanka and also averages higher against them than others.
Come November 1, the BCCI would’ve accomplished another mission — finding a way to get their best batsman in form.
(David Sidrat is the pen name of a would-be comedian who tries his best to be taken seriously and inadvertently fails in the process. He doesn’t quite see the irony of his life yet. He can’t figure out Twitter, and does not know what a Face Book is. He can therefore be found on neither platform)
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