Home > Features > Humour >

IPL 2013: Venkatesh Prasad replaces RP Singh in the RCB squad

IPL 2013: Venkatesh Prasad replaces RP Singh in the RCB squad

Venkatesh Prasad’s (left) slowish faster deliveries are surely a potent weapon compared to out-of-form RP Singh © Getty Images

By Ashwin Kumar

Please note this is a humour article – work of pure fiction
Royal Challengers Bangalore’s (RCB) cup of joy continues to spill over. Chuffed up by managing to choke their way to victory, RCB’s hopes of lifting the trophy this season got a major boost with Venkatesh Prasad — with former Team India bowler and RCB bowling coach — making a comeback, replacing  RP Singh in the squad. At 43, this makes Prasad the oldest and by far the slowest of the fast bowlers in the league.

“Age is in the mind, not in the body. And who says 43 is too old an age, to play cricket?” reasoned the bowling legend, one of the best practitioners of the slower ball right after a slow ball. “Besides, come what may, I’m sure I can bowl much better than RP Singh.”

The decision has been welcomed by everyone in the RCB camp with former skipper Daniel Vettori raving, “Oh mate, I tell ya, this is just great stuff. Myself, Muralitharan, Kartik, Syed Mohammad and now Venkatesh Prasad himself! It’s great to have him join us and adding to the team’s spin skill, with his trademark slower deliveries and their even slower leg-cutter variations. RCB’s spin attack looks very strong now.”

The news has delighted pacers Jaydev Unadkat and Vinay Kumar too, with the latter saying, “Dude, I bowl consistently at 120kmps and occasionally at 130 kmph. Imagine myself and Prasad bowling in tandem. When a batsman faces him in the previous over and then I in the next over, he’ll feel like he’s facing Shoaib Akhtar or Brett Lee! It’s amazing to have this kind of variety in our bowling attack.”

Indian Premier League (IPL) pundits opine that with age Prasad would have only got slower, and therefore more lethal. “And it’s not just slower over-rates but the sheer ennui of having to face six delivers with exponentially decaying pace that could completely upset the batting team’s rhythm and tempo,” observed Harsha Bhogle. Prasad’s proteges such as Munaf Patel and Ashish Nehra also hailed the move, saying it would be a great honour and privilege to bowl alongside their master.

Mumbai Indians have drafted in Anil Kumble to bolster their fast bowling stocks following the RCB move. “We’ll counter RCB’s now all too obvious strength in slow bowling with pace and bounce with Anil leading from the front with his top spinners,” revealed their head coach, John Wright.

Following this news, rumour mills are abuzz that Pakistani cricketer Aamir Sohail has approached former team-mate and Kings XI Punjab all-rounder Azhar Mahmood for help in obtaining a British Passport with the intention of playing in the IPL. “Time to settle some old scores, Azhar bhai,” Sohail reportedly remarked.

(Ashwin Kumar is an untrained musician, singer, writer/blogger, satirist, T Rajendar (pseudo)-fanatic, mimic, passionate about stopping female foeticide. The above article is reproduced with permission from http://www.theunrealtimes.com/, one of the top websites for satire, spoof, parody and humour in India.)

Pakistan vs Australia in UAE, 2014

Oct 30, 2014 (11:30 IST)   at Abu Dhabi

Sri Lanka tour of India, 2014

Nov 2, 2014 (13:30 IST)   at Cuttack

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Nov 3, 2014 (09:00 IST)   at Khulna

South Africa tour of Australia, 2014

Nov 5, 2014 (14:05 IST)   at Adelaide

Sri Lanka tour of India, 2014

Nov 6, 2014 (13:30 IST)   at Ahmedabad


West Indies tour of India, 2014

Nov 15, 2014  at Ahmedabad

Match cancelled

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Nov 7, 2014  at Bengaluru

Match cancelled

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 30, 2014  at Hyderabad

Match cancelled

South Africa tour of New Zealand, 2014

Oct 27, 2014  at Hamilton

No result

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Oct 25, 2014  at Dhaka

Bangladesh won by 3 wkts


Pakistan vs Australia, 2nd Test


Tendulkar provides teaser on upcoming book

Live Cricket Score Duleep Trophy Central Zone vs South Zone, final at Delhi Day 4:

Live Cricket Score: Pakistan vs Australia, 2nd Test, Day 3 at Abu Dhabi

Don Bradman dismissed twice on the same day

Rohit Sharma looks to strengthen career after an inconsistent year

Yuvraj Singh — have we seen the last of the man who won India three World Cups?

Australia Australia tour of UAE 2014 Australia vs Pakistan Australia vs Pakistan 2014 Central Zone Duleep Trophy Duleep Trophy 2014-15 India Pakistan Pakistan vs Australia Pakistan vs Australia 2014 South Zone South Zone vs Central Zone Sri Lanka Sri Lanka tour of India 2014

Live Streaming: Pakistan vs Australia, 2nd Test, Day 3 at Abu Dhabi

Live Scorecard: Pakistan vs Australia, 2nd Test Day 3 at Abu Dhabi

Pakistan vs Australia Live Cricket Score, 2nd Test at Abu Dhabi Day 3

Pakistan vs Australia 2014: Brad Haddin feels he will be able to bat despite injury

India vs Sri Lanka 1st ODI at Cuttack, Preview: Teams aim for winning start

Don Bradman dismissed twice on the same day

Virat Kohli’s captaincy opportunities important in context of India’s succession plans

Rohit Sharma looks to strengthen career after an inconsistent year

Younis Khan equals Javed Miandad’s record of most 150+ scores by Pakistan batsman

India vs Sri Lanka 2014: Manish Pandey showing signs of fulfilling potential

Fan of the Day

Niharika Shah

Niharika Shah

678 Posts | 6 Fans

Video Highlights: Younis Khan century during Pakistan vs Australia 1st Test at Dubai

India A vs Sri Lanka: Fringe players look to impress

NGOs pursue education for all

Dance Basanti from Ungli: Put on your dancing shoes and practice the Basanti move!

Weight Loss Tip #59: Eat oranges to lose weight

Sensex surges 150 points in early trade to regain 27,000-mark

PricewaterhouseCoopers partners Google to offer business solutions to clients

Google X Lab working on nanoparticles to help detect diseases early

Priyanka Chopra has the best no make-up selfie on Instagram, think fans!

Lisa Haydon: I slept off midway while watching the original Shaukeen!

International programme in Animal Husbandry

Also on cricketcountry.com

Play Fantasy Cricket & Win

Cash Daily! Click here