Home > Features > Humour >

Ishant Sharma called back to India squad for remainder of ICC World T20 2014

Ishant Sharma believes he can provide the impetus to India's bowling to be able to give their batsmen a considerable target to chase down © Getty Images
Ishant Sharma believes he can provide the impetus to India’s bowling © Getty Images

By UnReal Mama

Please note this is a humour article – work of pure fiction

Cometh the hour, cometh the man. Ishant Sharma has been re-inducted into Team India at the behest of its batsmen. The lanky pacer’s absence from the squad in the ongoing ICC World T20 2014 has been sorely felt, what with the Indian bowlers restricting the opposition to sub-par scores in the 130s, and even bagging ‘man of the match’ awards. This has not gone down well with the batsmen who want Ishant back in the squad so that the natural order can be restored.

The situation is so fraught that some batsmen like Suresh Raina are on the verge of depression. These Bangladeshi pitches are to the likes of Raina what a vegetable garden full of carrots is to a rabbit but Amit Mishra & co have spoiled the southpaw’s party. “Besharm ki tarah bowling kar rahen hain $%#$% @#$ [Bowling shamelessly],” Raina wailed to The UnReal Times.

Ace commentator Ravi Shastri too is missing Ishant. “My use of ‘that’s gone like a tracer bullet’ and ‘this could go down to the wire’ has come down by 80% in matches involving India, man,” the great man bemoaned. “How long can I keep plugging in ‘important phase of play’ when I have nothing important to say which is the case most of the time? Bringing Ishant back will be just what the….I mean it will be good for the game.”

Even skipper Mahendra Singh Dhoni’s spirits are down. “I tried my best to take yesterday’s game against Bangladesh to the last ball,” he noted wistfully, “before getting bored and finishing things with a spectacularly ugly slog. Really miss lambu, yaar.”

ICC World T20 2014 schedule: Match time table with venue details

ICC World T20 2014 Points Table and Team Standings

Ishant was vacationing in the Bahamas when he received the SOS and is all set to join the squad for the last of the league matches against Australia. The Indian team is planning a huge ‘welcome back’ party for the lanky pacer. “I know exactly what is expected of me and I am confident of delivering,” a jubilant Ishant told The UnReal Times, enroute to Bangladesh.

(Originally published in www.theunrealtimes.comUnreal Mama” is the pen name of CS Krishna & Karthik Laxman, founding editors of the site which is India’s favourite satire, spoof, parody and humour portal.)

India tour of Australia 2014, Practice matches

Nov 24, 2014 (05:29 IST)   at Glenelg, Adelaide

Pakistan vs New Zealand in UAE, 2014

Nov 26, 2014 (11:30 IST)   at Sharjah

India tour of Australia 2014, Practice matches

Nov 28, 2014 (05:29 IST)   at Adelaide

Afghanistan tour of UAE, 2014

Nov 28, 2014 (15:30 IST)   at Dubai

England tour of Sri Lanka, 2014

Nov 29, 2014 (10:00 IST)   at Colombo

More

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Nov 28, 2014  at Dhaka

Bangladesh won by 21 runs

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Nov 26, 2014  at Dhaka

Bangladesh won by 124 runs

England tour of Sri Lanka, 2014

Nov 26, 2014  at Colombo

Sri Lanka won by 25 runs

Hong Kong tour of Sri Lanka, 2014

Nov 24, 2014  at Colombo

Hong Kong won by 2 wkts

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Nov 23, 2014  at Chittagong

Bangladesh won by 68 runs

Photos

Phil Hughes suffers head injury: In photos

Videos

Phil Hughes passes away: Video tribute

Sean Abbott will find the road ahead a living nightmare

Phillip Hughes’ death: What happens to India vs Australia Test series?

Phillip Hughes 63 not out, forever

Phil Hughes: Remembering his most memorable knocks

Phillip Hughes passes away: Crying for Phillip Hughes

Australia England India India tour of Australia 2014-15 New Zealand New Zealand tour of UAE 2014 New Zealand vs Pakistan New Zealand vs Pakistan 2014 Pakistan Pakistan vs New Zealand Pakistan vs New Zealand 2014 Phil Hughes Phil Hughes Death Phil Hughes head injury Phillip Hughes

Bangladesh edge out Zimbabwe by 21 runs in 4th ODI at Dhaka

Phillip Hughes was destined for greatness: Steve Waugh

Afghanistan set 249-run target against UAE in 1st ODI at Dubai

Pakistan vs New Zealand 2014, 3rd Test at Sharjah Day 2: New Zealand finish on 249/1 at stumps

Pakistan vs New Zealand 2014, 3rd Test at Sharjah: Brendon McCullum reaches 150 off 137 balls

Phillip Hughes’ death: Cricket resumes, but with a heavy heart

Bangladesh vs Zimbabwe 2014, 4th ODI at Dhaka: Highlights

Mushfiqur Rahim and Mohammad Mahmudullah record second-highest fifth wicket partnership for Bangladesh in ODIs

Sean Abbott will find the road ahead a living nightmare

Phillip Hughes’ death: What happens to India vs Australia Test series?

Fan of the Day

Niharika Shah

Niharika Shah

682 Posts | 6 Fans

Video: Phil Hughes suffers head injury, collapses on field during New South Wales vs South Australia tie

India is becoming our largest overseas market, Xiaomi CEO Lei Jun says

Pukaar’s Rannvijay Singh will face new challenges with ‘Zen Life’

Yami Gautam Birthday: The Vicky Donor girl turns 26 (In Pics)

6 medical miracles that will blow your mind

OPEC daily basket price closes over three US dollars lower

Badlapur new poster: Varun Dhawan stuns us with his deadly rugged avatar – view pic!

More broadband connections to boost GDP growth in Asia Pacific: GSMA

6 must-have aromatherapy oils for your medicine cabinet

Also on cricketcountry.com

Play Fantasy Cricket & Win

Cash Daily! Click here