Home > Features > Humour >

Mahendra Singh Dhoni ready to face CBI probe!

Mahendra Singh Dhoni ready to face CBI probe!

By Rahul Roushan
 
Please note this is a humour article – work of pure fiction

After losing back-to-back series at home against England and Pakistan respectively, Indian cricket team’s captain Mahendra Singh Dhoni has declared that he had no problems if his captaincy was reviewed.

“Well of course, we have been losing too many matches of late,” Dhoni candidly admitted, “However, let us follow the law of the land. Knee-jerk reactions will not help anyone.”

The Indian captain said that he was ready to face a Central Bureau of Investigation (CBI)probe, or a show-cause notice, or a commission of inquiry headed by a retired judge, or any such similar stuff that usually follows when something goes horribly wrong in the country.
 
 ”You can’t just hang me because we lost a couple of series,” Dhoni protested, “Nor can you sentence me to face inquisitions by Arnab Goswami or ACP Pradyuman. A proper process has to be followed.”

Sources tell Faking News that Dhoni had the support of Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) President N Srinivasan. The BCCI chief had promised him that if the government didn’t come up with some commission of inquiry, BCCI itself will start a CBI probe.

BCCI will form a new body – Cricket Board of India – CBI, which may give a clean chit to Dhoni,” a highly placed source in BCCI revealed.

With Dhoni’s position possibly secured, coach Duncan Fletcher too is reported to be seeking inspirations from various public figures to get a clean chit for himself.

Fletcher is planning to meet Dhoni and demand immediate steps to strengthen the team’s performance,” a source disclosed. “Apparently he’s following the policy of Sonia Gandhi, who’s kind of coach of the UPA government and asks the government to take corrective steps from time to time.”

When Faking News asked Dhoni if he was ready for the eventuality where Duncan Fletcher could come to him and seek corrective measures in full public view, he said, “Aane do!

Meanwhile, unconfirmed sources claim that Virat Kohli has sent an SMS from his Celkon mobile to N Srinivasan that he was ready for a bigger role.
 
(Rahul Roushan, is a graduate from IIM Ahmedabad, who goes by the name of “Pagal Patrakar” (that’s “Crazy Journalist” in Hindi). Rahul says for him, “satire is an attempt to point out shortcomings or oddities in our society, ideally with a message and intent for betterment, in a non-hostile manner and without sounding overtly accusative or pontificating.” He is the Managing Editor of www.fakingnews.com from where the above article has been sourced with permission)

World T20 League 2014

Sep 22, 2014 (20:00 IST)   at Bengaluru

World T20 League 2014

Sep 23, 2014 (20:00 IST)   at Raipur

World T20 League 2014

Sep 24, 2014 (20:00 IST)   at Hyderabad

World T20 League 2014

Sep 25, 2014 (20:00 IST)   at Bengaluru

World T20 League 2014

Sep 26, 2014 (16:00 IST)   at Mohali

More

World T20 League 2014

Sep 21, 2014  at Hyderabad

Kolkata Knight Riders won by 4 wkts

World T20 League 2014

Sep 21, 2014  at Hyderabad

Hobart Hurricanes won by 6 wkts

World T20 League 2014

Sep 20, 2014  at Mohali

Kings XI Punjab won by 4 wkts

World T20 League 2014

Sep 20, 2014  at Mohali

Perth Scorchers won by 6 wkts

World T20 League 2014

Sep 19, 2014  at Raipur

NK won by 33 runs (D/L method)

Photos

KXIP vs Hobart Hurricanes, Match 2 CLT20 2014

Videos

Kane, Devcich praise each others knock

Chennai Super Kings (CSK) vs Dolphins, Match 8, CLT20 2014: Key Battles

Chennai Super Kings (CSK) vs Dolphins, Match 8, CLT20 2014: CSK’s likely XI

Chennai Super Kings (CSK) vs Dolphins, Match 8, CLT20 2014: Dolphins’ likely XI

Champions League T20 (CLT20) 2014: Kuldeep Yadav’s dramatic debut for Kolkata Knight Riders (KKR) shows he is one for the future

Cape Cobras vs Hobart Hurricanes CLT20 2014 — Highlights

Asian Games Asian Games 2014 Cape Cobras Champions League T20 2014 CLT20 CLT20 2014 Dolphins Hobart Hurricanes Incheon Asian Games India at Asian Games 2014 Kings XI Punjab Lahore Lions

Gautam Gambhir is a very good captain: Ryan ten Doeschate

Former England, South Africa cricketers part of team to play world’s highest game

CLT20 2014: In-form Northern Knights face upbeat Hobart Hurricanes

CLT20 2014: KKR look to do well in atleast two departments, says Suryakumar Yadav

Michael Clarke dismisses suggestions of quitting one-day cricket

Chennai Super Kings (CSK) vs Dolphins, Match 8, CLT20 2014: Key Battles

Chennai Super Kings (CSK) vs Dolphins, Match 8, CLT20 2014: CSK’s likely XI

Jalaluddin takes first ODI hat-trick

Chennai Super Kings (CSK) vs Dolphins, Match 8, CLT20 2014: Dolphins’ likely XI

Champions League T20 (CLT20) 2014: Kuldeep Yadav’s dramatic debut for Kolkata Knight Riders (KKR) shows he is one for the future

Fan of the Day

Niharika Shah

Niharika Shah

670 Posts | 6 Fans

CLT20 2014: Kings Xi Punjab vs Barbados Tridents, final over

From champions of the Asian Games to doping cheats — a quick history of athletes convicted of doping at Asian Games

Mars Orbiter Mission: Importance of ISRO’s short test

3 signs that told us why Tanishaa Mukerji and Armaan Kohli’s relationship wasn’t meant to be!

Hrithik Roshan has a dozen Hollywood scripts waiting in the pipeline!

Reliance Jio signs tower sharing deal with Indus Towers

Smartphones to account for two third of worlds market by 2020

EPL 2014: 3 reasons why Chelsea should buy-back Frank Lampard

How sugar affects your beauty

Also on cricketcountry.com

Play Fantasy Cricket & Win

Cash Daily! Click here