Home > Features > Humour >

Mahendra Singh Dhoni resigns; choice of new captain most shocking!

Mahendra Singh Dhoni resigns; choice of new captain most shocking!

MS Dhoni… over and out © Getty Images

By Mad Scientist

Please note: This is a humorous piece – pure fiction.
 
In a bid to salvage the fast-sinking reputation of Indian cricket, the Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) has acted decisively, even as India slumped towards a humiliating defeat to England at Eden Gardens.
 
Announcing a series of radical measures to bring back the lost glory of Indian cricket, BCCI President N Srinivasan dropped a bombshell by announcing that Mahendra Singh Dhoni has stepped down as India’s captain after five years at the top. But it was the choice of his successor that blew everybody’s mind away. The man taking over as India captain is 83 old Prabir Mukherjee, curator of the Eden Gardens. 

Srinivasan revealed, “At an urgently-convened emergency meeting of the BCCI, members felt that the team needed a strong, opinionated man to shepherd Indian cricket through these stormy times – someone who did not depend on pitches or conditions or care about authority. It is widely-accepted fact that the Indian team is full of pampered superstars, many who are overweight or past their date. We needed a man who didn’t care about reputations, somebody who would call a spade an overweight spade.”

Readers of The Unreal Times might recall that Mr Mukherjee had famously taken on the BCCI, Dhoni and Cricket Association of Bengal by refusing to doctor a pitch to suit the home team’s whims and fancies. 

CAB President Jagmohan Dalmiya sounded elated as he recalled, “In 1953 when Prabir was passed over for the Bengal Ranji Team, an astrologer had told him he would make it to the Indian Team instead one day. That day has finally come.”

In his honour, the Bengal Government immediately declared a 21-day lock-out of all government offices.

(Mad Scientist is a humorist with http://www.theunrealtimes.com/  from where the above article has been reproduced with permission. UnReal Times is one of the top websites for satire, spoof, parody and humour in India)

India tour of England 2014

Jul 27, 2014 (15:30 IST)   at Southampton

Pakistan tour of Sri Lanka, 2014

Aug 6, 2014 (10:00 IST)   at Galle

India tour of England 2014

Aug 7, 2014 (15:30 IST)   at Manchester

South Africa in Zimbabwe, 2014

Aug 9, 2014 (13:30 IST)   at Harare

Pakistan tour of Sri Lanka, 2014

Aug 14, 2014 (10:00 IST)   at Colombo

More

Afghanistan tour of Zimbabwe, 2014

Jul 24, 2014  at Bulawayo

Afghanistan won by 100 runs

South Africa tour of Sri Lanka, 2014

Jul 24, 2014  at Colombo

Match drawn

Afghanistan tour of Zimbabwe, 2014

Jul 22, 2014  at Bulawayo

Afghanistan won by 2 wkts

Afghanistan tour of Zimbabwe, 2014

Jul 20, 2014  at Bulawayo

Zimbabwe won by 8 wkts

Afghanistan tour of Zimbabwe, 2014

Jul 18, 2014  at Bulawayo

Zimbabwe won by 6 wkts

Photos

India vs England 2014, 3rd Test

Videos

Highlights of Phil Hughes' double ton

Moeen Ali – the part-timer keeps pegging India back with crucial wickets

India vs England 2014, 3rd Test at Southampton: India’s sloppy batting and other highlights of play on Day 3

Moeen Ali’s ‘Save Gaza’ wristband suspension: Cricket and political sentiments don’t mix

Denesh Ramdin: Didn’t expect Sunil Narine to bowl Super Over maiden

India vs England 2014, 3rd Test at Southampton: Virat Kohli’s opportunity to find form

Alastair Cook England England vs India England vs India 2014 India India tour of England 2014 India vs England India vs England 2014 South Africa South Africa tour of Sri Lanka 2014 South Africa vs Sri Lanka South Africa vs Sri Lanka 2014 Sri Lanka Sri Lanka vs South Africa Sri Lanka vs South Africa 2014

Happy Birthday, James Anderson!

Harbhajan Singh congratulates wrestler Sushil Kumar for CWG 2014 gold medal

Nottinghamshire, Somerset involved in dramatic tie in Royal London One-Day Cup

India tour of England 2014: Moeen Ali is developing as a spinner with every game, says Stuart Broad

India vs England, 3rd Test at Southampton: Draw the most likely result, feels Sunil Gavaskar

Moeen Ali – the part-timer keeps pegging India back with crucial wickets

India vs England 2014, 3rd Test at Southampton: India’s sloppy batting and other highlights of play on Day 3

India’s poor shot selection gives England advantage on Day 3 of 3rd Test at Southampton

‘Yuvraj, Ganguly, Zaheer and Indian team to come together in support of my charitable cause’

Moeen Ali’s ‘Save Gaza’ wristband suspension: Cricket and political sentiments don’t mix

Fan of the Day

Fan Cricket

Fan Cricket

11 Posts | 2 Fans

Brazil vs Netherlands, 3rd place Fifa World Cup 2014 match Video Highlights

India vs England, 3rd Test at Southampton: Stuart Broad lauds performance of England bowlers on Day 3

FDI in telecom jumps manifold to $1.5 billion in April-May

Apple MacBook Pro with Retina Display given a speed boost, prices slashed across the range

Rafael to miss rest of Man Utd’s tour of the USA with groin injury

Shah Rukh Khan wishes his fans a happy Eid-view pics!

Harbhajan Singh congratulates wrestler Sushil Kumar for CWG 2014 gold medal

Salman Khan’s Kick trailer crosses 16 million views!

Prevent Diabetes Tip – get regular health check-ups

Also on cricketcountry.com

Play Fantasy Cricket & Win

Cash Daily! Click here