Home > Features > Humour >

Night watchmen protest after Modi’s dig at Dr. Manmohan Singh!

Night watchmen protest after Modi's dig at Dr. Manmohan Singh!

By UnReal Mama

Please note this is a humour article – work of pure fiction

Being a night watchman is more than just ducking bouncers.

Narendra Modi’s jibe at Dr. Manmohan Singh that he’s the “night watchman” for the family, has sent the cricketing fraternity into an indignant frenzy, with nightwatchmen across nationalities taking strong exception to the Gujarat Chief Minister’s slight on what is essentially a very challenging trade.

“The comparison is uncalled for,” said Jimmy Anderson. “It takes courage and tremendous application to face wily spinners and fast bowlers with their tail up, to survive out there and take your team through to stumps. You cannot hope to do that by simply existing. If Mr. Modi had watched a bit of Test cricket, he’d have known that.”
Indian night watchman Ishant Sharma concurred with his English counterpart. “As someone who pursues night watchmanship full-time these days, I can say that there’s tremendous honour in the role, and it is a lot more than simply taking blows and staying put. Often, we do give it back — through the occasional edge running away to the third man boundary, and the odd inspired cover-drive — something that cannot be said of our Prime Minister.”

Another prominent former Indian night watchman Irfan Pathan has spoken up as well. “I am deeply offended by this thoughtless remark. I regret sharing stage with Narendra Modi during the Gujarat elections.”

Former specialist batsman Virender Sehwag added, “I am relatively new to this role, but even I can vouch for the fact that it’s more difficult being a night watchman than it seems.”

Congress spokesperson, Renuka Chowdhury, also chipped in, saying, “I agree with Ishant and Pathan. How can you called our Prime Minister a chowkidaar, haan? This is very derogatory.” Sagarika Ghose was quick to point out that his use of Test cricket metaphors that went over the heads of people like her was proof of Modi’s non-inclusive, narrow-minded approach.

Meanwhile, Dr. Manmohan Singh himself has protested the Gujarat Chief Minister’s remark. “I may not have scored, but I haven’t got out either. I’d think that entitles me to the status of at least someone like Akash Chopra,” the Prime Minister confided to The Unreal Times with a pained expression.

(“Unreal Mama” is the pen name under which CS Krishna (left) and Karthik Laxman (right), the founding editors of The Unreal Times (www.theunrealtimes.com), write fictional news reports, dressing room conversations and other such articles marrying humour with satire. The Unreal Times is India’s favourite satire, spoof, parody and humour portal from where the above fake Facebook wall has been reproduced with permission)

World T20 League 2014

Sep 20, 2014 (16:00 IST)   at Mohali

World T20 League 2014

Sep 20, 2014 (20:00 IST)   at Mohali

World T20 League 2014

Sep 21, 2014 (16:00 IST)   at Hyderabad

World T20 League 2014

Sep 21, 2014 (20:00 IST)   at Hyderabad

World T20 League 2014

Sep 22, 2014 (20:00 IST)   at Bengaluru

More

World T20 League 2014

Sep 19, 2014  at Raipur

NK won by 33 runs (D/L method)

World T20 League 2014

Sep 18, 2014  at Mohali

Kings XI Punjab won by 5 wkts

World T20 League 2014

Sep 17, 2014  at Hyderabad

Kolkata Knight Riders won by 3 wkts

World T20 League 2014

Sep 16, 2014  at Raipur

Northern Knights won by 6 wkts

World T20 League 2014

Sep 16, 2014  at Raipur

Lahore Lions won by 55 runs

Photos

CSK vs KKR, Match 1 CLT20 2014

Videos

Anderson plays golf with Jaguar competition winners

Live Cricket Score Cape Cobras vs Northern Knights, CLT20 2014: Northern Knights win by 33 runs via D/L method

Furious MS Dhoni and CSK check out of Hyderabad hotel following Biryani episode

Chris Cairns cleaning bus shelters? Why?

Herbert Chang: The Jamaican of Chinese origin who wasted his life in South Africa

Champions League T20 (CLT20) 2014: Kings XI Punjab’s batting gets the extra punch with Thisara Perera’s inclusion

Cape Cobras Champions League T20 Champions League T20 2014 Chennai Super Kings CLT20 CLT20 2014 CSK vs KKR Hobart Hurricanes Hobart Hurricanes vs Kings XI Punjab Kings XI Punjab Kings XI Punjab vs Hobart Hurricanes KKR vs CSK Kolkata Knight Riders Northern Knights Pakistan

Kane Williamson: Always trying to work on my shots

Northern Knights win by 33 runs through D/L method against Cape Cobras in CLT20 2014, 3rd match

Cape Cobras consolidate after early breakthrough against Northern Knights in CLT20 2014, 3rd match

Hashim Amla dismissed for Cape Cobras against Northern Nights in CLT20 2014, 3rd match

Trent Boult dismisses Stiaan van Zyl for Northern Knights against Cape Cobras in CLT20 2014, 3rd match

Northern Knights vs Cape Cobras in CLT20 2014, 3rd match: 5 talking points

Ramesh Saxena: The Bihar mainstay with a restricted Test career

Pananmal Punjabi: A nonagenarian Test opener

Don Bradman’s 99.94 — the hand of Neil Harvey in the average

Chris Cairns cleaning bus shelters? Why?

Fan of the Day

Niharika Shah

Niharika Shah

669 Posts | 6 Fans

Video Highlights: Kings XI Punjab (KXIP) vs Hobart Hurricanes (HH) CLT20 2014

iPhone 6 launch: Tim Cook kicks off sale at Palo Alto Retail Store, obliges fans with selfies

Alibaba shares debut at $92.70 on New York Stock Exchange

Deepika Padukone Speaks Against the ‘Times of India’ Decision to Post the ‘Cleavage Show’

खाना को चबाने के पाँच फ़ायदें

Qubool Hai: Will Aahil make Sanam cry?

5 things that make Sonam Kapoor’s Khoobsurat different from Rekha’s original

Parineeti Chopra and Aditya Roy Kapoor’s ‘Daawat-e-Ishq’ Leaves Audience Hungry For More

सेक्स टिप #2: केला खाकर अपने सेक्स लाइफ को बनाए बेहतर

Also on cricketcountry.com

Play Fantasy Cricket & Win

Cash Daily! Click here