Home > Features > Humour >

Shane Watson announces his retirement from all forms of cricket — via three-slide PowerPoint Presentation!

Shane Watson announces his retirement from all forms of cricket — via three-slide PowerPoint Presentation!

An angry Shane Watson packs his cricketing kit for the last time © Getty Images

By Rahul Roushan

Please note this is a humour article – work of pure fiction

Australian all-rounder Shane Watson has become the first international cricketer to announce retirement via a PowerPoint presentation.

Usually cricketers address a press conference or issue a press release when they hang their boots, but Watson uploaded a three-slide PPT on SlideShare, where he announced that he had retired from all forms of cricket under coach Mickey Arthur.

His first slide read “Click to add title“, which suggested that Watson didn’t make a good presentation even while announcing retirement.

“He must have been pretty upset and in a hurry, so forgot to add title,” a member of the Australian cricket team tried to explain the rebel cricketer’s actions.

The second slide had the only bullet point saying “I have retired“, which made it clear that it was his retirement presentation.

However, the background of the second slide was a wallpaper of Bollywood actress Shilpa Shetty, which briefly confused people if it hinted at retirement of Shilpa Shetty from acting.

“No, no, Shilpa is not retiring, assuming she’s active in Bollywood. I used a slide from the IPL [Indian Premier League] presentations, and I’d like to use this opportunity to clarify that I’d continue to play in the IPL, unless of course Mickey is given a contract by any IPL team,” Watson explained his second slide.


Shane Watson announces his retirement from all forms of cricket — via three-slide PowerPoint Presentation!

Shane Watson with his pregnant wife Lee Furlong © Getty Images

The third slide had the usual “Thanks. Any questions?” and a smiley of Mickey Mouse, the meaning and symbolism of which was not explained by the 31-year-old cricketer.

Cricket Australia didn’t comment on the development, though sources claim that Watson could be given a show-cause notice for adopting double standards while making presentations.

“He could have given a similar presentation to the coach too, and I’m sure the coach would have appreciated a presentation that is in line with on-field performance,” a Cricket Australia official told Faking News.

Meanwhile MBA students from round the world have welcomed the format of a PowerPoint presentation containing just three slides, including the introduction and thank-you slides.

“This is Twenty-20 format of a PowerPoint presentation; this must be encouraged!” said a student from one of the leading b-schools of India.

(Rahul Roushan, is a graduate from IIM Ahmedabad, who goes by the name of “Pagal Patrakar” (that’s “Crazy Journalist” in Hindi). He is the Managing Editor of Faking News. Rahul says for him, “satire is an attempt to point out shortcomings or oddities in our society, ideally with a message and intent for betterment, in a non-hostile manner and without sounding overtly accusative or pontificating.” The above post has been reproduced with permission from www.fakingnews.com)

The Michael Clarke-Mickey Arthur Bombshell

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 20, 2014 (14:30 IST)   at Kolkata

Pakistan vs Australia in UAE, 2014

Oct 22, 2014 (11:30 IST)   at Dubai

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 22, 2014 (19:00 IST)   at Cuttack

South Africa tour of New Zealand, 2014

Oct 24, 2014 (03:00 IST)   at Mount Maunganui

Zimbabwe tour of Bangladesh, 2014

Oct 25, 2014 (09:00 IST)   at Dhaka


South Africa tour of New Zealand, 2014

Oct 21, 2014  at Mount Maunganui

South Africa won by 6 wkts

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 17, 2014  at Dharamsala

India won by 59 runs

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 14, 2014  at Visakhapatnam

Match cancelled

Pakistan vs Australia in UAE, 2014

Oct 12, 2014  at Abu Dhabi

Australia won by 1 run

West Indies tour of India, 2014

Oct 11, 2014  at Delhi

India won by 48 runs


India vs West Indies 4th ODI at Dharamsala


AB de Villiers speaks ahead of New Zealand ODIs

South Africa vs New Zealand 2014: 5 memorable matches

Yasir Shah: The new spinning sensation for Pakistan

Virat Kohli takes wicket with the first (0th?) ball of his T20I career

Kevin Pietersen’s autobiography — a litany of complaints with a few redeeming patches

Banning West Indian players in IPL can affect the ‘Brand value’ of the event – Will BCCI take this gamble?

Australia Australia tour of UAE 2014 BCCI India India vs West Indies India vs West Indies 2014 New Zealand Pakistan Salaam Cricket South Africa West Indies West Indies cancel India tour 2014 West Indies tour of India 2014 West Indies vs India West Indies vs India 2014

West Indies players allowed to play IPL

ICC World Cup 2015: Hagely Oval gets ICC accreditation

Rohit Sharma to make comeback, Manoj Tiwary to lead in practice match against Sri Lanka

India vs Sri Lanka 2014: Venues for 5 ODIs announced

MS Dhoni rested, Virat Kohli to lead in first 3 India vs Sri Lanka ODIs

MS Dhoni rested, Virat Kohli as captain, and other points of interest from squad for first 3 India vs Sri Lanka ODIs

India vs Sri Lanka 2014: MS Dhoni gets much-needed break ahead of Australia tour

Virat Kohli becomes fastest to 20 ODI hundreds

A Pakistan all-time XI: A galaxy of captains

James Neesham can provide more impetus to New Zealand’s weakened batting up the order

Fan of the Day

Gautam Singh

Gautam Singh

474 Posts | 5 Fans

Video Highlights Mohammed Yousuf drops catch after watching a girl in bikini

अभिनेत्री हुमा कुरैशी ओरिफ्लेम की ब्रांड एंबेसडर

Has Bigg Boss 8 made Karishma Tanna the most hated person?

Pranab Mukherjee returns home after visit to Norway, Finland

Revealed: First look of Amitabh Bachchan-Farhan Akhtar’s Do!

7 reasons why having sex during pregnancy is great for your health

Videocon Infinium Graphite with gesture control feature launched, priced at Rs 10,499

Rupee up 19 paise against dollar in early trade

Twitter introduces Audio Cards to listen to music directly from your timeline

Also on cricketcountry.com

Play Fantasy Cricket & Win

Cash Daily! Click here