As seen above, the ICC’s allegation was completely correct.
As seen above, the ICC’s allegation was completely correct.

Following his third consecutive hundred the International Cricket Council (ICC) has banned Younis Khan from batting due to his suspect action. Abhishek Mukherjee explains why the ICC’s reasoning is sound.

Please note this is a humour article — work of pure fiction

Younis Khan had already etched his name in the annals at Dubai: he scored two hundreds (the first Pakistani to do so out of Pakistan), thus completing the full set of hundreds against all Test-playing countries; he had also become Pakistan’s leading century-maker. The Australians, especially Michael Clarke, were extremely graceful in defeat.

Younis scored his third consecutive Test hundred (Zaheer Abbas and Mudassar Nazar have been the only Pakistanis, and both of them had done it in Pakistan) at Abu Dhabi. The Pakistan camp had more reason to celebrate as Azhar Ali scored a hundred as well and Pakistan finished on an emphatic 304 for two at stumps on Day One.

Things changed when the news broke in the evening: Younis had been banned by the International Cricket Council (ICC) from batting. Unlike bowlers, who are usually put under radar under such circumstances till a verdict is announced, Younis was banned with immediate effect during the innings. Younis became the first cricketer to be banned from batting.

The question remains: was Younis’ ban justified? The general ICC cut-off for a suspect action is 15°; a closer look at the above photograph reveals the angle: Younis’ elbow seems to be bent by an outrageous 28°, nearly double the permissible limit.

Pakistan had already received a setback following the ban on bowling of Saeed Ajmal. To make things worse, Mohammad Hafeez had been reported for a suspect action during the Champions League T20 (CLT20) 2014 as well. The third blow in the span of a couple of months would definitely push Pakistan cricket back significantly.

“The boys played well,” said former Pakistan captain and champion batsman Inzamam-ul-Haq when asked about ICC’s decision. “In the second half it is not easy for the spinners to bowl because of dew factor. People are loving it and I am also. He is debutant and he has experience.”

“It’s the other one, just like the other one,” said former Pakistan captain Rameez Raja. His pearls of wisdom continued: “His existence has come to an end. Younis does bend his elbow while batting. His batting is a perfect example of how to bend your elbow while batting.”

Suspicions were raised that this was a deliberate ploy by The Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI), Cricket Australia (CA), and England and Wales Cricket Board (ECB) — commonly referred to as “The Big Three” — but they have all denied such allegations. An ICC spokesperson refuted the allegation of discrimination against non-Big-Three cricketers vehemently.

Complete coverage of Pakistan vs Australia in UAE

(Abhishek Mukherjee is the Chief Editor and Cricket Historian at CricketCountry. He blogs here and can be followed on Twitter here.)