IPL 2013: Behind-the-scene reports of the CSK-Mumbai Indians match
By UnReal Mama
Please note this is a humour article – work of pure fiction
With all the drama and action happening off-field, tuning into the match seemed rather difficult. It is a testament to our passion for cricket and relentless commitment towards reporting events as they take place that we sacrificed NewsHour, flushed every bit of doubt, cynicism and analytical thinking from our minds and hearts, and sat down to watch the first of the playoffs. In hindsight, that may have saved our eardrums as well. If Mumbai Indians skipper Rohit Sharma had any confidence going into the match, owing to his team’s 100 per cent record in the league stage over Chennai Super Kings, it quickly evaporated when mentor Anil Kumble pulled him aside for a chat.
His counterpart Dhoni on the other hand went through the same emotions, only in the reverse order.
Strike bowler Mitchell Johnson, however, knew something that the two captains didn’t. When he noticed who was bowling at the other end, the Australian’s chest swelled with pride, and the pacer steamed in the first ball…
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…only for it to be dispatched as quickly to the boundary by Michael Hussey. The Delhi pitch was as much help to the bowlers as the home conditions were for the Delhi Daredevils this season, and the fielders found themselves on a leather hunt within no time. To make matters worse, Kieron Pollard and Dwayne Smith did their side no favours by combining to send back Murali Vijay. And when Smith spilled a Suresh Raina skier a few overs later, the dreaded T-word entered the discussions.
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After that, it was smooth sailing for the two left-handers. The duo survived the Ojha scare…
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…and accelerated without breaking into a sweat, prompting Subramaniam Badrinath to fling his bat and pads in frustration and retire to the dressing room for a session of batting in Street Cricket on his Play Station.
As Hussey and Raina’s partnership stretched into the final overs, MSD was in an unusually pensive mood in the dugout. Perhaps he had just logged on to Twitter to discover that Vindoo and not the match was the top trend and half of the Vindoo referenced tweets had pictures of the B grade actor sitting next to Sakshi in the VIP box during CSK matches.
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Having never been as close as 22 yards to a God, an overawed Dwayne Smith holed out. Sir Jadeja, however, was by no means satisfied. He dried up the runs, trapped Dinesh Karthik LBW and shattered the morale of the Mumbai middle order.
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Dhoni did his best to blunt the impact…
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…but to no avail. Skipper Rohit Sharma once again gave into his craving for Maggie, which means it was left to the big man Kieron Pollard to take Mumbai home. The burly Trinidadian briefly risked blasphemy by tonking Sir Jadeja for two maximums, but natural order resumed in the end when Pollard scythed one straight to Hussey at square leg.
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With his job done, Sir retired to long on to resume his penance, even as the rest of the CSK bowlers fed on the Mumbai tailenders much like hyenas feed on a carcass after the lion has had its fill. The orange cap returned to Hussey, and the purple cap returned to Bravo.
The CSK boys took off to celebrate the win. Skipper MSD, however had more pressing matters to attend to after the match.
(Originally published in www.theunrealtimes.com. “