Obama praises IPL hosts Karishma Kotak, Rochelle for cricketing acumen, draws flak globally

Karishma Kotak’s (above) cricketing insights have drawn attention of the President of USA – Barack Obama © IANS

By UnReal Mama

Please note this is a humour article – work of pure fiction  

President Obama finds himself in the eye of a storm once again, this time for taking political correctness to absurd levels, drawing flak from not just feminists and the politically correct types but practically everyone. The President, an avid fan of the Indian Premier League (IPL), praised its female reporters Karishma Kotak and Rochelle Maria Rao for — of all things —  their cricketing acumen.  “Ms Kotak and Ms Rao are brilliant, dedicated and tough,” Obama said before pausing to check himself. He then added, “Oh, they also happen to be by far the best cricket analysts in the country.”

As soon as he made those remarks, feminists were one again up in arms. Sagarika Ghose was the first to express her disapproval, saying, “I know he was trying to be politically correct after the Kamala Harris incident. But to hint that Karishma and Rochelle are on IPL Extraaa Innings for their cricketing knowledge and not their fetching looks is taking things way too far.”

IPL organisers and producers of Extraaa Innings T20 also expressed their disappointment. “We take pride in adhering to high standards when it comes to selection of female anchors. We sieved through hundreds of Big Boss contestants, former Miss Indias, VJs and pretty young things with zero knowledge of cricket before zeroing on in these ladies and for President Obama to praise them for everything but their looks feels like a kick in the groin,” lamented Sougata Basu, head of Set Max.

Harsha Bhogle, mouth wide still wide open with incredulity, was heard muttering incessantly, “If Rao and Kotak were picked for cricketing knowledge, then I can bowl faster than Dale Steyn and hit bigger sixes than Chris Gayle.”

Soon world leaders also joined the growing chorus of ridicule with British Prime Minister David Cameron saying, “Whoa!! Obama needs to balance political correctness with credibility. That was way over the top.”
Rajiv Shukla attempted the douse the surging rage. “I will talk to Obama sir and explain that this is India, not US, where you don’t have to be hyper-politically correct. I’m sure it is cultural misunderstanding. I will ask him to praise Kotak and Rao for good looks and then jig to Jumping Jepaang (sic),” observed the IPL commissioner.

President Obama later issued a retraction. “In hindsight, my earlier statement sounded incredibly phony, given this is the IPL. So let me rephrase it and speak my mind: Karishma Kotak and Rochelle Rao are brilliant and dedicated and last but not the least, they are on Extraaa Innings T20 because they are awesomely smoking HOT. WHOO!”

(Unreal Mama” is the pen name under which CS Krishna and Karthik Laxman, the founding editors of The Unreal Times (www.theunrealtimes.com), write fictional news reports, dressing room conversations and other such articles marrying humour with satire. The Unreal Times is India’s favourite satire, spoof, parody and humour portal)