The BCCI feels Indian cricketers are doing just fine and so is Indian cricket after their series win over England © Getty Images
The BCCI feels Indian cricketers are doing just fine and so is Indian cricket after their series win over England © Getty Images

 

Please note: This is a humorous piece – pure fiction.

 

Citing India’s unassailable 3-0 lead over visiting English cricket team in the ongoing ODI series, the Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) has claimed that cricketers were now getting used to too much of cricket and critics should stop complaining about the jam-packed calendar.

 

It may be recalled that many critics and Indian cricket fans had earlier blamed too much of cricket, especially T20 cricket, for horrible performance of Indian team when they toured England a couple of months back.

 

“They were not rested, instead they played in the Champions League T20 tournament and some domestic matches,” BCCI President N. Srinivasan pointed out the schedule of Indian cricketers that has seen non-stop cricket since ICC World Cup. “And look what happened after that; Indians are playing splendidly now, winning all the three matches against England quite convincingly. All this talk of too much cricket doing harm to the team is bullshit,” he added.

 

Initially the BCCI President refused to admit that there was anything like “too much cricket”, citing the fact that many BCCI officials never felt tired of it. “Rajeev Shukla is a Congress MP fighting Anna Hazare and now he’s also the IPL chairman, who will fight Lalit Modi. He will also continue to be our spokesman; he never complained about too much work!” Srinivasan argued. “And of course we have Sharad Pawarji, who is willing to think cricket day in and day out, even as he has to discharge duties as Union Minister.”

 

When Faking News pointed out injuries among Indian cricketers, widely believed to be a result of “too much cricket”, Srinivasan first ascribed them to “bad weather conditions” in England but later settled for players’ inability to adapt themselves to the new calendar.

 

“Ok fine; maybe earlier they were a bit uneasy about it, but now they don’t have any problem,” BCCI President concluded on behalf of the players.

 

“Indian cricketers are doing just fine and so is Indian cricket. And we must thank Twenty20 matches for bringing about this change. Champions League T20 trophy was the turning point.”

 

Sources suggest that to celebrate the Indian victory over England, BCCI is planning to organise some special T20 matches on “available dates” before West Indies tours India in November and India leaves for Australia in December.

 

“I’m sure Dhoni would be available to play in these matches and improve India’s chances of victory against West Indies and Australia,” hoped Srinivasan, who also owns the IPL team Chennai Super Kings, captained by MS Dhoni.

 

(Rahul Roushan, is a graduate from IIM Ahmedabad, who goes by the name of “Pagal Patrakar” (that’s “Crazy Journalist” in Hindi). Rahul says for him, “satire is an attempt to point out shortcomings or oddities in our society, ideally with a message and intent for betterment, in a non-hostile manner and without sounding overtly accusative or pontificating.” He is the Managing Editor of www.fakingnews.com from where the above article has been sourced with permission)