Humour: Pepsi's sponsorship promises to fizz up things in the IPL

BCCI seems to be humming, “Yehi hai right choice baby” while dancing their way to the bank © Getty Images

Please note: This is a humorous piece – pure fiction.

Pepsi has bagged the rights for the title sponsorship of the Indian Premier League (IPL) for a whopping Rs 396 crores to see the Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) laughing all the way to the bank. However, a learned source has come out with some interesting information on the considerations, apart from the moolah, that were thrown around.

The conversations kind of went about this way:
 
Rajeev Shukla apparently announced that Aircel and Pepsi were the top bidders and Pepsi’s bid was very high. “You see, in addition to the amount of money that we will make, it will also make for an interesting marketing statement. Just imagine the headlines “Pepsi puts the fizz back in the IPL — and in our bank accounts, of course!”
 
A BCCI member butted in, “But we will now be forced to rename every moment in the match.”
 
“Precisely!” said Shukla. “On such a momentous occasion we should be happy to make such simple changes, whenever a batsman hits a six, instead of calling it a DLF Maximum, we can call it ‘Pepsi-Sexy Shot!’ And whenever a fielder takes a catch we call it, ‘Canned It!’
 
As if on cue, one of the other committee members perked up and said, “And if a bowler takes a wicket, instead of Citi Moment of Success, we can call it “Sweet Success”. We all know how much sugar Pepsi products have.”
 
Another member suggested: “When the match is boring, we should have an “Aliva moment” to make the game interesting. And if a batsman escapes an lbw decision or a run out decision, we should be able to call it an “Amul slice of good luck.”
 
And finally the icing on the cake: “If there is any team that overcomes its fears and wins matches we should call it the “Mountain Dew performance .” Kyonki darr ke aage jeet hai.
 
“Doesn’t Aircel offer anything like this?” asked one of the dissenters. Shukla looked at him as if he had asked for terrorist Ajmal Kasab‘s pardon. “We cannot market it well. Plus it’s not very well known and neither are their products. Of course when someone spills a catch we can call it a “Missed Call” moment and stuff like that, but beyond that what?”
 
Shukla concluded triumphantly: “You see, this is a company that has the money and the products to take IPL to the next level, with the right amount of fizz. We can even call the highlights as the “Diet” package.
 
My friends, just wait and taste the thunder! Suddenly people in the room were exchanging glances and Shukla had no clue why!

Stay tuned….

(Dhananjay Devasper is an “IT guy” by profession and a sports fanatic at heart. He has an unbridled passion for sports and Indian achievements in sport. Extremely opinionated, he attempts offering perspectives around sports which are simple to understand and easy to relate with)